Negative triggers in intimate relationships require you pausing before you respond. If you feel the other is disrespecting you, make this an opportunity for insight to develop understanding. The initial reaction of anger, hurt, or fear cannot be minimized by uncontrolled responses. All interactions are personal, so not taking behavior personal is difficult. Ultimately you are the one who has the most to lose, because your anxiety is non-sharable. No other person, no matter how close can experience your discomfort. Unintended, but painful interactions leave scars if you begin to internalize these exchanges.
Seize the opportunity to take this incident and see if you can understand its purpose. If you yourself are in a state of vulnerability you will interpret even benign comments as negative. You must recognize the significance of body language, which many times speaks louder than words. Think about your own mood, and the signals you may be transmitting to those you know. Do a gut check to make sure you are not sending mixed signals? All communications are a two way street. People react to the traffic of their lives. People fall in love but they drift apart. This is not just a saying but the numerous and repetitive misjudgments in the meaning of communications, especially with those we are close to. Respect is the basis of lasting relationships where it is the walk and not the talk that matters! Never let the length of a relationship be taken for granted.